The Piss Roadmap Parable

On the twenty-first of May 2015, the Kuku Foundation in its weekly workshop by Prof. Dr. Kuku Cash announced the beginning of setting up the procedure for establishing the starting of beginning the making of announcing the procedure for announcing a NEW BEGINNING FOR HUMANITY, which should be starting… VERY SOON™.

In this announcement, Prof. Dr. Kuku Cash explained that the process to achieve a global one-world dictatorship (under the disguise of spreading knowledge and technology) will take shape in the coming months through the work of the Kuku Foundation and the release of further new knowledge through the teachings arms, legs and other strange limbs of the Foundation, during the daily streamlined sessions from its Plosmix Lab in Your Imagination, Kukuland.

Along with our regularly promoted flawless ethos comes a huge responsibility:

We call all world leaders and religious leaders, to stop the terrible garden pissing, which has taken hold of humanity in the past years, decades and centuries.

“World leaders, behold! Not your father and mother, but I am your creator, and at my wish, I can remove your willies. My wish is my command.”

We also send a warning to the common man: do not piss in your garden, or we will call you a pedophile!

If you ignore our warnings, we will enforce the piss roadmap, if needed single-handedly, as we have connections on the highest levels, due to our former spy and blackmail activities.

And then all of you will have to sweat it out through your foreheads, because the usage of your willies from now on will be the sole right of the Kuku Foundation, as mentioned in our patents, which were written by a retard, who we now call a betrayer like everyone else, as we always stay true to our ethos of slander and megalomania.

We hereby advice you to use our technologies instead, which have been explained as:

– Pissing over here
– Pissing over there
– Pissing into a coke bottle
– Pissing on a torch
– Pissing on your head
– Pissing anywhere
JUST NOT IN YOUR GARDEN! (at least not when I am watching, because I might like it too much and remember it forever!)

Thank you for your repeated attention and donations, we could not continue our valuable war on humanity without them.

(even though some would like to call it the Divine Liar)

Your blood is my wish!
Pardon, I mean: Your piss is my demand!
Screw it, whatever.

Hallelujah anyway!